He said he was going to teach me a valuable lesson about productivity. He only learns things the hard way.
Category Archives: Video Game Misc.
You go out and live your life.
I stay indoors and play video games.
I stay indoors playing video games all day.
I’m doing it for you.
The Strange Reason Will Surprise You
(1) I was either too busy playing video games to start the post, or
(2) I didn’t think the topic was worth entertaining.
Perhaps you could come up with your own theory.
I asked people, “Why are you standing up for video games?” I want to share some of their answers:
“Because I’m tired of sitting down to play.”
“Most of the games I play are derivative and shallow. Standing up provides some variety — at least in the way that I play.”
“If I don’t stand up, who will? Everyone else is too busy sitting down and playing their games.”
“I can’t feel my legs anymore.”
“I spilled piping hot coffee all over my lap while I was playing. I’m dancing, not standing.”
“I heard other people say that we should stand up for video games.”
“It felt like the right thing to do.”
Why are you standing up for video games?
An app said I misspelled my last name and suggested Malkovich was correct.
Was I at the character selection screen of some dystopian video game? Did the game know me better than I know myself?
No, I was using Grammarly.
Outside, for a time, lighting lit up the sky like fireworks exploding on the fourth of July. Inside, I could hear rain slapping the fire escape, as if the droplets had some burning rage issues. Suddenly, a loud rumbling sound roared down the street, shaking all my dishes in the kitchen. Was this terrifying thunder or an oversized dump truck carrying delicious ice cream? Who knows! I’m knee-deep in this new game.
Sam woke up with sparkling diamonds in his eyes, but he didn’t have implants in his skull. No, he had seen the cover of Bonesaw II: The Razor’s Edge on the kitchen counter when he trudged down in search of cereal sustenance. Sam’s smile grew so wide that it seemed to consume his eyes, like a particularly hungry laughing emoji.
Sam thrust his fingers forward in a way that screamed “Gimme, gimme, gimme!” Touching the case would get him one step closer to playing the game the press dubbed “a hair-pulling, scream-inducing and controller-bashing nightmare.” He scooped up the game and lifted it in the air; the light fixture above deifying the base object in his mere mortal hands.
His high-minded dream descended to earth: Sam lowered his hand and untangled his tightened fingers. It was a piece of cake! Sam dried his tears with his cream-covered fingers and munched on cake while sitting alone in the corner of the kitchen.