Category Archives: Video Game Misc.

“My Video Games Were Talking to Me Last Night”

“Oh, yeah, what did they say?” Sam asked.

The wind rushed down the street and made the trees dance and sway; some became a little silly and nearly fell over. Suzanne already started to walk away as the wind grabbed hold of something that fell out of her pocket. That thing was a crumpled piece of paper: the wind dragged it through a terrible state of torment before bashing it against Sam’s sneakers. He picked up the note as gusty winds threw up enough dust to make Suzanne disappear.

The note read, “They told me to stop talking to you and to spend more time playing.”

There was only dust in the wind as Sam stood there—cleaning his glasses.

1 Comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

Being John Malkovich?

An app said I misspelled my last name and suggested Malkovich was correct.

Was I at the character selection screen of some dystopian video game? Did the game know me better than I know myself?

No, I was using Grammarly.

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

There Was a Storm?

Outside, for a time, lighting lit up the sky like fireworks exploding on the fourth of July. Inside, I could hear rain slapping the fire escape, as if the droplets had some burning rage issues. Suddenly, a loud rumbling sound roared down the street, shaking all my dishes in the kitchen. Was this terrifying thunder or an oversized dump truck carrying delicious ice cream? Who knows! I’m knee-deep in this new game.

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

Let Them Play Games

Sam woke up with sparkling diamonds in his eyes, but he didn’t have implants in his skull. No, he had seen the cover of Bonesaw II: The Razor’s Edge on the kitchen counter when he trudged down in search of cereal sustenance. Sam’s smile grew so wide that it seemed to consume his eyes, like a particularly hungry laughing emoji.

Sam thrust his fingers forward in a way that screamed “Gimme, gimme, gimme!” Touching the case would get him one step closer to playing the game the press dubbed “a hair-pulling, scream-inducing and controller-bashing nightmare.” He scooped up the game and lifted it in the air; the light fixture above deifying the base object in his mere mortal hands.

His high-minded dream descended to earth: Sam lowered his hand and untangled his tightened fingers. It was a piece of cake! Sam dried his tears with his cream-covered fingers and munched on cake while sitting alone in the corner of the kitchen.

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

She Doesn’t Play Games

She says she plays video games.

1 Comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

How I Got My Dose of Video Games Today

I couldn’t be bothered to pick up a controller, so I typed this post instead.

4 Comments

Filed under Video Game Misc.

It Was a Dark and Stormy Day

But I turned on my video games, and the clouds went away.

1 Comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

You’re Stuck in the Past, Man!

Meena: “I heard you like video games.”

Jake: “I love video games! Playing them is my favourite hobby.”

Meena: “What kinds do you play?”

Jake: “I only play games made before 1991.”

Meena raised one eyebrow and tilted her head.

Meena: “Why?”

Jake scratched his head.

Meena: “I’ve heard there are some classic games made before 1990. But have you even considered trying some newer games?”

Jake: “I… uh…”

Jake screwed up his face. His lips mouthed words, yet he now uttered nothing intelligible.

Meena went home. She slammed the door behind her so hard that a porcelain vase, which was close to the door, shook and fell to the ground, shattering into hundreds of tiny pieces. While Meena fell asleep at home, Jake was still standing there; his bubbling lips still trying to form words.

1 Comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.

Do You Consume Your Video Games?

Or do they consume you?

3 Comments

Filed under Video Game Misc.

A Dirty Job But Someone’s Gotta Do It

Jake sported a mischevious grin as he stood in front of the presents.

“Hey Jess, did you check that you wrapped the right games for James and Joyce?” he asked.

“Oh no! I completely forgot! I don’t know what I’m going to do now,” said Jess.

Jake replied, “It’s okay: I’ll get to the bottom of this if it takes me all night.”

Jake unwrapped both presents and ripped the packaging off the games before Jess could reply.

“I can’t be sure which game is which until I beat both from start to finish; their covers are so similar,” he said.

“Oh, I didn’t know that. Ok, do whatever you need to do. You’re my hero.” She left the room with a big grin on her face. Before Jess had exited the door, Jake had already booted up the game and pressed start. He rubbed his palms together, put his feet up on the coffee table and laughed to himself.

“Yeah, and can I get a few beers while I act heroically?”

He turned around and started playing the first video game.

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Misc.