Tag Archives: life

A Tale of Two Trash Cans

Sara started playing her video game without a care in the world. Her character ran around the town helping villagers. One spectre haunted the town: the smell of rotting garbage that rats grew fat on it.

Sara’s character took action into her own hands. She challenged the rats’ king to a gallant sword fight. She snapped the king’s sword in half and sent the lot of them scurrying for cover in the sewer, and the villagers gave her warms hugs. This victory over the king was just the start of the character’s good work.

Sara’s character sauntered around the town, throwing out everyone’s trash. When she emptied the last trash can, the villagers held a celebration. The fireworks were deafening!  The gold flowed towards her like a running river. They even painted a massive portrait of her character ascending into heaven. The corners of Sara’s lips curled into a smile warm enough to melt ice.

Suddenly Sara was jolted from this fantasy slumber when her roommate Samara entered the room and said, “Hey, what have you been doing all day?” Before Sara could reply, Samara spoke again, “I’ve just run a mile, filed my taxes and strategized paradigm shifts for my meeting.”

Sara hit pause on the game and said, “I had oatmeal and took out the garbage.”

“Pfft! Took out the trash,” Samara muttered as she turned around and walked away. She walked away so tall and so straight that one could have mistaken her for a steel poll.

Sara looked at Samara’s back for two seconds. She glanced at the TV screen. She scratched her head. After all of that, she shrugged her shoulders and kept playing her game.

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Filed under Silly Video Game Inspired Fiction

A New Way to Play

I walked up to the video game console. I hit eject and the disc shot out faster than a bullet zipping over my head. I ducked, the disc missed me and shattered into thousands of shiny splinters as it hit the wall. I planted myself on the couch, grew roots, and lost myself in thought.

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Filed under Video Game Misc.

I Have a Confession to Make

I’m ashamed to admit this. I think the Three Stooges had more of an influence on my life than video games.

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If a Soccer Mom Played a Grand Theft Auto Game

“Hey Max,” said his mother, Kathy, “whatcha playin’?”

Max had his back turned to his mom. On screen, his character was firing a rocket launcher while dangling from the bottom of a hovering helicopter. The rockets whizzed and screeched out of the launcher and turned enemy choppers into massive fireballs.

“Huh?” he asked.

A couple of seconds later, Max’s character was touching the ground and was driving a Mercedes-like car. Kathy, still behind Max, sighed.

“Ah I hate this mission. I can never get there in time to drop the people off before the timer runs out,” said Max still staring at the screen.

Max could feel a pair of eyes, with laser-like focus, burning a hole in his back. He shot his mother a quick glance and saw she had folded her arms and was glowering at him. He put down the controller.

Max said, “Alright, alright I’ll go do it now. Sheesh! I never get any me time.”

When Max left, Kathy reached for the controller with a shaky hand. She stopped herself. First she looked left, right, under the couch. “Is anyone here?” she asked herself. After one could see all doubt was removed, she plopped herself down on the couch and started playing.

The current objective was to drive two kids to basketball practice on time. “Haha hmmm”, she thought, “well why not?”

She took off in the car, but the car lurched forward when she tried to stop at a red light.

“Ooops!”

A torrential downpour fell down her forehead because she saw a cop car on the opposite side of the intersection. Nothing happened. The cop car drove past. Kathy went on her merry way in the game world.

“Well that’s strange,” she thought as she sped up the car a little bit.

Kathy wiped the sweat from her brow and checked her left and right blind spots before she continued driving. She slumped down a little in her seat, as if she felt a little small for what she planned to do next, and she accelerated faster than any sane person would in this world.

She smiled when she heard no sirens and saw no kids. Kathy thought she could do whatever she wanted to accomplish her mission. After a while, she did not even see other people or drivers in the world. In fact, after a couple of minutes, she came to an intersection that only had tumbling tumbleweeds.

But as she revved her engines and slammed on the gas, a pedestrian rounded the corner, and she “bumped” into him. A slight delay on screen ensued between the bump and the pedestrian falling over.

Kathy put her hand over mouth and muttered something inaudible.

And she spoke up, “Oh dear, oh I’m so, so sorry!”, she said. She had her character roll down the car window and searched for a button to say something. All she could find was a button that made the character taunt the pedestrian with rude thrusting gestures.

“Oh no! This is even worse,” she said.

The pedestrian didn’t turn around. He just wiped the dirt off his shoulder and kept walking. No one stopped Kathy or said anything to her.

She moved her hand away from her mouth, and her demeanor changed. She thought, “Oh, what the hell; I’ll just keep going. No one seems to care in this world anyway.”

She smirked and lifted one corner of her mouth much higher than the other. She revved up her engine and was counting to three.

Suddenly, the expression on her face changed. She hit pause and put down the controller. Kathy pushed her hand under chin and lurched forward on the couch until she looked Rodin’s “The Thinker.”

“Wait!”, she thought, “should I be going faster? Should I keep doing this? How should I treat others and what am I even doing here?”

She concluded it was a good game, picked up the controller and kept playing.

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Filed under Video Game Misc.

My Only Fear of Death

Is respawning next to this crazy guy with the machine gun. Look at him: he’s just camping out there and mowing down anything that crosses his path. Can I live?

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Hell Is No Other People

Maybe video games don’t need other people, but I do. I also need love, water and sunshine, near a nice windowsill, to grow. Oh and some good food too. How about you?

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Filed under Video Game Misc.

If You Could Only Play One Video Game for the Rest of Your Life

What would it be and why?

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Filed under Video Games: Reader Q&A